Ch. 3 - Where Superman Grew Up

You know what? Kansas wasn't so bad. Sure, it was long... no single state should be that long, really. But after driving through it for a couple hours I actually started to find the landscape quite interesting and the drive went pretty quickly. Maybe it was just my frame of mind that lent the land its epic quality, but I was surely taken with it. I kept thinking about how vast and open the land still was out there, and how many Manhattans could physically fit into just one of the enormous fields I was passing right off of I-70. This is where Superman was raised.. where Dorothy and her little dog lived.. where only about 150 years ago cowboys were crossing these great plains, over 600 miles from Kansas City to Denver, on freakin' horses! Horses! It is hard for me to even imagine how much their asses hurt. This is the stuff of American legend, this is God's Country!

Now, I'm not saying I would want to stop and live there, it is the dead center middle of nowhere after all. And I think too many people who live there now take God's Country way too literally, if you know what I mean, but it sure was nice to drive through it at 85 mph. The following pictures are excerpted from my "Behind A Sonic Burger in Russell, KS" series. See what I mean.. mythic. Even Foxy the car thought so.

I arrived in Lafayette, CO just before 6pm.. I had made it to Mountain time and the third stop on my trip. I was almost immediately farted on and tackled by my Cousin Becky's two sons, age 7 and 4. More on them soon, but for now this chapter ends with an advanced literary technique they once learned me in school: Foreshadowing. Since this post is about Kansas, I thought it appropriate to show you my latest souvenir now:

Ch. 2a - Kansas City Here I Come

I hit Kansas City with a one track mind. I had done my research and all signs pointed to Arthur Bryant's. Everyone seems to agree that it is the oldest, most universally loved barbecue joint in a town chock full of some of the best barbecue joints in the country. I quickly checked into my hotel (more on that later) and sped off towards the original Arthur Bryant's location, my stomach talking to me the whole way.. he couldn't contain his excitement either. As soon as I got out of my car in the parking lot, the smell in the air told me I was not going to be disappointed. A local, who must have read the hunger in my eyes, held the door open for me as I walked in. As we passed, he said, "Don't worry, I left a little for ya!" Friendly folks!

I stepped up to the counter, through the old-school, laid back dining room, and ordered my burnt end sandwich and fries from the surly, impatient-with-obviously-not-from-around-here-newbies counter man, and sat down for what at this point I had convinced myself would be the meal of my life. I had to take pictures of this experience for two reasons: 1. To document like any good tourist, 2. Because there are simply no adequate words to describe how good this seemingly simple open-faced sandwich was. Damn if it really wasn't one of the best meals I've ever had. The deep, layered flavors of quality meat; the varied tender, crispy textures of the burnt ends; the sweet and spicy vineger based sauce; the four thick slices of fresh white bread... not to mention the fries! You just have to go.

So, I ate like the king of Kansas City and rolled myself out of the restaurant, into my car, and back to my hotel... which just so happened to be the Harrah's North Kansas City Hotel and Casino. Can you guess why I chose to stay there? Hi, my name is Joel, and I have a problem.. but it's only a problem when I lose! I was so tired at this point, after nearly 11 hours on the road and full-to-popping with burnt ends, that I couldn't play too long, though.. only long enough to win another 80 bucks! Oh yeah!

I staggered to my room, slept like a rock (if rocks were made of barbecue), and awoke the next morning ready (if not a little weary) to make the straight, flat, long, long, long.. long trip across the whole of Kansas, into Colorado.

Ch. 2 - Gateway to the West

Tuesday morning, 7am, Mitch and I said our teary (but totally macho.. cause we're men) goodbyes and I hit the road again. The plan was to make it to Kansas City, MO by days end, where gambling and barb-e-que awaited. But before I got there I would have to go through Indiana (corn fields), Illinois (more corn fields), and the rest of Missouri (St. Louis, then corn fields).

Speaking of St. Louis... That arch thingy is impressive! Seeing it on TV or from afar is cool and all, but I think I took it for granted. Up close the thing really stunned me with its brute beauty and scale. The fucker is big! I didn't even ride to the top - just stood next to it, touched it, walked through it, looked up, and pondered. It was a significant moment.. I was now officially in the west.. kinda. I had gone through the Gateway at least. Symbolism doesn't get much more obvious!

After getting philosophical for a minute, I came to and had visions of barbecue sandwiches dancing in my head.. I had best be getting on down the road. I paid my $6 Arch parking fee (a warning for you future wanderers) and headed across the mighty Mississippi River.